The Autistic Family

Let me just come out with it, being the mother of a child with autism has its ups and downs.  

I have been doing this though for the past 25 years and while it has been the most challenging thing I have ever experienced it also continues to be the one thing that consistently brings me to the throne of God.  Jesus has blessed me time and time again with His loving presence and guidance and has brought me more joy than I ever thought one woman could deserve.

The challenges faced by “The Autistic Family” are unique.  Some days it is hard to stay focused on the task of raising the next generation for Christ when you are dealing with behavioral outbursts, dietary issues, and obsessions!  While one of my children is autistic I have 5 other children that are not.   Each one of my children is valuable individuals that deserve to be loved and cherished for the person that God made them to be.  In our book Chosen, we explain that for the family with a child displaying special needs, giving the other children in the family the attention they need can be a problem.   Often the child (or adult in my case) can need constant attention and require the energy that is needed to parent the other children.  It often seems like an impossible situation.

Autism is a group of

complex disorders of brain development.

These disorders are characterized,

in varying degrees,

by difficulties in social interaction,

verbal and nonverbal communication

and repetitive behaviors.

Because of the inability of autistic individuals to understand the world around them, this can cause many awkward situations for the family.  While it is embarrassing and humbling to have a child that acts out in inappropriate ways it also can cause the members of the family to see the world around them in a different light.  I have found that that is a gift!  My daughter Kylie, continues to teach me new things daily, that I would not have learned if not for her autism.

Being a part of the autism community has been a pleasure.   Being a part of a community for a long period of time allows you to look at problems that arise.  I have made some observations about autism and it affects the family.  Much like autism which is in its simplest sense a disorder of extremes.  We see the extremes played out in the family.  You either see families falling apart, siblings a mess and divorce taking place or you see families being strengthened and unified by the struggle.  You don’t see many families in between.

So what makes the difference between a family surviving and thriving or failing?

I don’t want to oversimplify this obviously complex topic, however,  in reality, it is quite straightforward.  An abiding saving faith in Jesus Christ changes everything.  It allows you to get your thoughts off of yourself and onto the eternal perspective of our Heavenly Father.  Faith encourages you and picks you up out of the pit on those days, weeks and months that are so very difficult.  A relationship with Jesus allows you to see that your feelings are not always the truth and that marriage and family are more about expanding the kingdom than your personal wishes.   Faith allows you to view eternity from God’s perspective.  It makes you understand that love covers over a multitude of sins and that saving power of Jesus has the ability to not only save you personally but to flow into all the areas of your life.  The love of Jesus can redeem every single situation that you might face.

The truth is that every family

will have trials and joys,

it’s just a part of life.  

Isn’t it?